How to react to a friend who is not voting

Collage showing Kamala Harris (left) and Donald Trump (Right). Left photo shows Kamala Harris wearing a blue suit and holding her hand up. Right photo shows Donald Trump wearing a basic black suit with a red tie while holding his hand up.
Left photo: U.S. Vice President Kamala Harris takes the Oath of Office on the platform of the U.S. Capitol during the 59th Presidential Inauguration in Washington D.C., Jan. 20, 2021. (DoD photo: U.S. Air Force Senior Airman Kevin Tanenbaum)/Right photo: President Donald J. Trump disembarks Marine One at Valley International Airport in Harlingen, Texas Tuesday, Jan. 12, 2021, and boards Air Force One en route to Joint Base Andrews, Md. (Official White House Photo by Shealah Craighead)

Last week, Jason and I had dinner with a couple we’ve been friends with for many years. Like us, he’s a longtime journalist. Some believe he leans right, but he always claims his opinions are grounded in reason, fact and common sense. He told me that he couldn’t vote for Kamala Harris, but also couldn’t bring himself to vote for Donald Trump. I must admit, my frustration was apparent, especially because our strong bond has always been based on logic — and this stance felt illogical, especially coming from a journalist. He mentioned various reasons, including disagreements with her positions and not knowing who she is.

He is a proud journalist, and for that reason alone, I believe he’s purposefully clouding his judgment. If he truly wants a free press, there’s only one candidate to vote for. If he believes in the constitutional right of journalists, it has to be Kamala. Trump has openly stated that he would lock up journalists who disagree with him. Failing to vote for the candidate who will protect your rights as a journalist is doing direct damage to the First Amendment.

My friend also stated that he supports Ukraine. Again, there’s only one candidate who will continue to support Ukraine in its fight against a murderous Russian regime, and that is Kamala Harris. Donald Trump wants Putin to run wild.

Then there are Trump’s lies, which fuel violence and division. Two American cities have suffered from these lies. In one, Trump claimed that immigrants were eating their neighbors’ pets, and in another he falsely stated that immigrants had taken over the town. Republican leaders from those cities and states had to step in to correct Trump’s misinformation. Most recently, during the hurricane crisis, Trump’s lies created an atmosphere so hostile that FEMA workers helping victims had to be relocated for their safety. Trump’s lies inspired armed militias to hunt FEMA workers. How one can read a sentence like that and still waver in supporting Harris is beyond me.

My friend also says he supports marriage equality. Yet there’s only one candidate who will protect that right—and it’s Kamala Harris. Trump would appoint more Supreme Court justices intent on overturning Obergefell, regardless of what claim to the Senate Judiciary Committee.

Most importantly, my friend claims to strongly support democracy. But Trump has stated he would use the military during elections, and he has openly expressed his desire to be a dictator — even if “just for one day.” Over 200 former presidential appointees, from Reagan’s administration to Trump’s own, have stated that Trump is a danger to democracy. A vote for anyone other than Harris means that Trump has that much greater chance of doing the worst damage to our country possible. A vote for a third party or no candidate at all might soothe an ego, but it will harm this country gravely.

If you search hard enough, you can always find reasons to not vote, but we know the positions of both these candidates. Not voting for the one who will protect freedom of the press and democracy is illogical if those are pillars of your beliefs. In an election this close, not voting, or voting third party, essentially equates to a vote for Trump. You might not agree with all of Harris’s positions, but we know exactly what Trump stands for because he’s made it clear. Every vote in this close election counts. If you don’t vote for the candidate who supports freedom of the press, the Constitution, women’s health rights, marriage equality and democracy itself, then you cannot claim to support those values when you don’t use your vote to protect them. As President Joe Biden showed us, it’s time to put country above ego.

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