Creep of the Week: One Million Moms

"Creep of the Week" is typed out over a red background.

I’m not really a parade person. I’ve never understood the allure of Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade (MTDP). New York is really cold in late November. I’ve caught glimpses of the parade on TV over the years, and even that feels cold. So many people in earmuffs and puffy jackets. Hard pass.

Except for this year, mind you. Because the MTDP was a nonbinary and transgender extravaganza. Was that enough for me to pack a bag and high-tail it to New York? Absolutely not. But I cheered the queering of the MTDP from my couch in Michigan.

I never even would have known that MTDP was going gay all the way if it weren’t for One Million Moms (OMM), a group of, presumably, moms, who rail against anything and everything LGBTQ+ in popular culture. The organization also does not have one million members. But I have to agree that One Million Moms sounds better than One Thousand Moms or A Handful of Moms Who Are Haters.

Honestly, I can’t really think of a better PR team for any company or entity that wants people to know it accepts LGBTQ+ people than to be targeted by OMM. Like, I’m a card-carrying member of the Gay Agenda, and I didn’t even know what Macy’s was planning. OMM truly has its finger on the pulse.

On their website, under a photo from the 2003 MTDP of Harvey Fierstein In Drag As Mrs. Santa, OMM writes, “The non-binary and transgender extravaganza on display this Thanksgiving will be brought to you by Macy’s during their annually sponsored Thanksgiving Day Parade. Unless they are forewarned about it, this year’s holiday parade will potentially expose tens of millions of viewers at home to the liberal LGBTQ agenda.”

It’s wild to me that conservatives still believe that sexual orientation and gender identity are contagious. Especially since so many of these same conservatives refused to believe the same thing of COVID-19 while people all over the world died (and are still dying). Anyway, I suppose OMM believes they are doing the Lord’s work and forewarning about what they believe will be an LGBTQ+ super spreader event.

I read on, anticipating the juicy details.

“Performances showcased in the parade will include music from two Broadway musicals, ‘& Juliet’ and ‘Shucked,’ both of which feature transgender and non-binary performers in major roles.” OMM writes.

Wait, OMM is mad because MTDP will include… performances from Broadway musicals? What? Is OMM just now learning that musicals are, um, not exactly known to be the domain of the straights?

“Justin David Sullivan, who personally identifies as non-binary, will be featured in the ‘& Juliet’ parade performance. On stage in the musical, Sullivan plays the role of ‘May,’ a non-binary friend of Juliet,” OMM writes. “This year, Sullivan declined eligibility for the Tony Awards, saying traditional acting categories need to be reconsidered to become more ‘inclusive’ of gender non-conforming actors.”

Hmm, sounds like Sullivan is, well, kind of awesome? Declining eligibility for a Tony in order to stand up for what you believe in sounds pretty badass to me.

“Alex Newell, a biological male who also identifies as non-binary, won a Tony Award this year for his starring performance in ‘Shucked,’ playing the female role of Lulu,” continues OMM. “Newell, who uses all pronouns (he/she/they), has worn women’s clothes in recent public appearances and dressed in a shimmering, gold ball gown for the Tonys.”

Hmm, I keep scanning this part about Alex Newell looking for the problem. It sounds like OMM is mad because Newell is too fabulous?

OMM then helpfully informs readers that “Thanksgiving Day, this liberal nonsense will be broadcast live from New York on NBC, starting at 8:30 a.m. Eastern.”

OMM urged people to sign their petition telling Macy’s: “I do not agree with the LGBTQ agenda you are pushing on families during your Thanksgiving Day Parade. My family and I will not watch this indoctrination. Since this event goes against our beliefs and values, Macy’s has left conservative and Christian families with no choice but to avoid the parade and its stores, even during the holiday season. My family will not support Macy’s; you have lost our trust.”

At the time of this writing, the “one million moms” had gathered around 30,000 signatures. Which meant 30,000 fewer people to contend with on Black Friday while getting those sweet, sweet Macy’s deals. Thanks for the shopping tip, OMM!

D’Anne Witkowski is a writer living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBTQ+ politics for nearly two decades. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

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