I cry for you.
I haven’t stopped crying all day.
I am torn apart, aching like I have never ached before.
This massacre in Orlando is horrific. The worst massacre in American history. How? Why?
I know this is the action of a deeply troubled, highly radicalized, terribly homophobic madman.
I do understand this intellectually. I know evil exists in this world. I understand that senseless acts of inhumanity occur daily. I have seen it before. I have witnessed it before. Up front and close.
But this hits home. Hard.
I just don’t know how to channel my pain, my hurt, my sorrow.
I love each of you my brothers, each and every one of you whom I’ve never met, never known and never will know. Yet I feel a deep connection to you knowing that I Am You and You Are Me.
I was murdered last night with each of you. I could have been. All it would have taken was being in a club on any given night, dancing, drinking, enjoying time with friends. I’ve been there many times before. Just not this night.
Yet, as your souls, your bodies, your spirits were taken from us so too was mine. So too was every gay man’s.
I ache. I ache from head to toe. Every part of my body, my heart, my soul aches. I am speechless. I am angry. I am devastated.
You, my brothers, are gone. I love you. I love you. I love you.
I will do everything in my power to make sure that your spirits live on in each of us, every day.
You made the ultimate sacrifice in life simply by living your lives, openly, honestly, authentically.
You are my heroes.
As God as my witness, I will march on in your memory.
May your memories be for a blessing and may your families be comforted at this time of immense sorrow and grief.
I love you. I love you. I love you.
Lee Rosenfield is married to his husband of 20 years. They live in Lambertville, N.J., with their two children and two dogs. Rosenfield is the president of Rosenfield Consulting, a firm specializing in financial-resource development and strategic planning for nonprofit organizations.