Chelsey Hately, Shelly Splinters, Absolutely Stabulous, Clobberella, Back Stabbath, Mace Kelly and FoXXXyContin . .. No, theses are not members of a bizarre girl gang or a new drag-queen revue, but rather the names of former and current members of the Penn Jersey Roller Derby league, a bi-tracksual (they skate on both banked and flat tracks) skating league here in Philadelphia. The league is co-ed and full of fierce and fun competitors on teams with equally amusing names, like the Dishonor Roll and men’s team the Hooligans. I attended one of the recent matches and once I got the hang of it — figuring out the difference between a jammer and a pivot and what they do — I had a great time. I also had a chance to talk with skater Natasha Wirth, aka Mar’ge Equality from the Sadistic Sweethearts.
PGN: Tell me a little about yourself. NW: I grew up in the Lehigh Valley, between Easton and Bethlehem, and then went to school in Glenside at Arcadia University.I majored in sociology, with women’s and gender studies, and Spanish was my minor.
PGN: What made you choose those areas? NW: I came into my college pursuits thinking I wanted to do an international peace and conflict-resolution program, but after the first class, I realized it wasn’t for me. I wanted to work on issues on a more communal level. So I spoke with Dr. Ana Maria Garcia, who has since become my mentor and family friend. She is the chair of the Sociology Department and I realized that’s where I needed to be. She helped create an independent study course for me, which included readings on queer theory.
PGN: What was a favorite course? NW: Women Across the Globe. We talked and Skyped with women around the world about gender equity, gender-based violence, and it was a real hands-on, out-of-the-textbook experience. It got a lot of people in the class to start examining society with a critical eye about gender inequities. It really generated some amazing conversations and I’m still in touch with many of my classmates to this day. All my classes were phenomenal. They really know what they’re doing at Arcadia.
PGN: Ever get to use your Spanish? NW: In college, I got a scholarship to go to Argentina for six weeks. That was a little crazy. I was supposed to be going to a women’s empowerment center. After traveling on my first independent flight alone — a 19-hour flight across three countries — I arrived and spoke to the program manager who spoke very little English except to say, “We decided to put you somewhere else.” And I was taken to a shelter for at-risk teenage mothers, which was Catholic and pro-life! It was only 30 minutes after my arrival in Argentina, and I thought, Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into? It wound up being a very powerful experience. Despite the organization not having the same views as I did regarding women’s rights, they were empowering the women and providing shelter and resources, and I was able to see how healing faith and spirituality can be for some people. That was huge. It took me way out of my comfort zone but was one of the biggest learning experiences I had in college. It was also the summer of 2010 and marriage equality was on the ballot in Argentina. There was a huge march in town that I was able to attend, and I was there when the bill passed. It was a great time to be there. And I’ve been able to use my Spanish ever since as a bilingual counselor and in other positions. It’s opened a lot of doors for me.
PGN: And what do you do off the skating track? NW: I’m a medical case manager for the Mazzoni Center. Ever since I was at Arcadia, I had my eye on Mazzoni and knew that that’s where I wanted to be. It’s lived up to be everything I could ever want. From the staff to the administration to the volunteers, they’re all incredible and all want to be there.
PGN: Switching gears, when did you come out? NW: I’m very fortunate, my family is very progressive. My stepmom identifies as bisexual and others in the family are also very fluid in their sexuality and came out to me when I was younger. My coming-out experience was me at Kohl’s with my stepmom. She’d noticed that I’d been frequently texting a girl that I worked with, and as I stood by the jewelry counter she came up to me and said, “So, what’s her name?” It was very low-key. The whole family has been very loving and supportive. They really love my girlfriend and I’ve never had to deal with any negative experiences. I love them very much and they’ve always had my back.
PGN: Any siblings? NW: I have a stepsister who’s moving to the city to attend Temple so I’m really excited about that, and I have a little brother who is still in Easton with my mom.
PGN: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal or blanket as a kid? NW: [Laughs.] Yes. Since I moved to the city I haven’t been able to find it, but somewhere I have a very old, disheveled Puffalump. It’s a baby-blue, obnoxious, stuffed-elephant type thing I’ve had since I was 2. I took it everywhere, including Arcadia.
PGN: You started off wanting to major in international peace and conflict resolution, and now you slam people around on a skating track. How did that come about? Were you always involved in sports? NW: I was. I played soccer for many years so I was definitely looking for something to fill that void. I had a friend who was skating with the Lehigh Valley Rollergirls and that put the bug in my ear. About two years ago, Penn Jersey was looking for new people to join the team so I tried out. I fell a lot at first, but the person running the rookie classes, Classy Chassis, was an incredible teacher. She came off as a hard-ass but she just wanted to push us to go beyond our limits and become better and stronger skaters. Most of the people who graduated in that class are still skating. In fact, a number of the girls I skated against last night were from that rookie class.
PGN: Is it hard to hip-check a friend? NW: Yeah, it’s tough to be super-aggressive when you love the people you’re skating against, but the soccer player in me finds a way, and at the end of the day any bad feelings stay on the track; we don’t let it interfere with our friendships.
PGN: Ever get any flack being an openly gay player? NW: No, roller derby is very queer-friendly. Once I got interested in the sport, I started researching it from a feminist and queer lens. I was doing my thesis on the third wave of feminism and how it’s queering the ideas of gender and sexuality and social-justice issues. Roller derby really fits in to that third wave of feminism; they fuck with the binary. There’s no binary in roller derby. Our league is co-ed and we accept all people. We have a trans-inclusive policy. We have a lot of queer skaters on our team and all the teams I’ve interacted with have been very LGBT-friendly. It’s a very empowering place to be. And it’s gaining momentum. It’s been featured in Sports Illustrated and in numerous publications and it has its own online channel. It’s great to see the queer community have another outlet and a large body of people in our corner. We did our biggest fundraiser at Sisters every year, so when they went out of business it was heartbreaking for our whole league. We loved Denise Cohen and everyone who worked there.
PGN: You all have, should we say, colorful names. What’s your favorite? NW:We have a guy whose skating name is “I Don’t-Care Bear” and it perfectly suits him. “Dental DAM-age” and “Misfortune Cookie” always make me laugh. A lot of people have names that relate to their profession, so we have a graphic designer who goes by “Vincent Slam Gogh.” It’s really fun to get to know the people in the league through their names. It’s like a doorway into their personalities and passions.
PGN: Well, your name certainly was a giveaway when I was looking to see if there were any gay skaters! NW: [Laughs.] One of my teammates didn’t get it until a month or two later! It’s fun, I love skating and hearing people scream, “We want Mar’ge Equality!” I think just getting people talking and thinking about it is important.
PGN: I saw a website called “’Tash Does Derby.” Is that you? NW: Yes. I wanted to start a blog to document what it was like to be part of roller derby from my time as a rookie until now. It’s been fun to write and I think fun to read.
PGN: Does the team have any rituals? NW: Not really. When the Sadistic Sweethearts first got our new uniforms, we all put them on bright and early before our first match and were texting each other pictures and getting each other riled up. Some people still put on their uniforms early just to get in the zone. And we have a little obnoxious, pink sparkly, cat-shaped piggy bank sort of thing that we keep on the bench. It’s like our token and we pass it around from person to person and put all of our negative juju in it.
PGN: Here’s a random question. Three favorite loud sounds? NW: When a bunch of people are skating around the track, it makes its own special sound. There are parts of the track that aren’t flush, raised just a tiny bit, and when the skates hit them it also makes a special clank. [Laughs.] There’s something comforting about that for me! Our apartment is very close to our neighbors and in the morning when I’m supposed to get up, I usually ignore the alarm clock but I know it’s really time to get up when I hear my neighbors unlocking their car with the remote. That little beep-beep sound. It lets me know I really need to get my rear in gear and get my day going. And my dogs’ obnoxious barking would probably be number three.
PGN: What deceased star would you like to bring back for one last performance? NW: I’m a huge John Lennon fan, and I’d love to see him perform live.
PGN: If you could own your own shop, what would you sell? NW: That would be a toss-up between two things: A roller-derby gear shop here in South Philly, because there’s not really anywhere to buy gear except online, and I wouldn’t mind owning a bookstore/café.
PGN: The longest line you’ve stood in? NW: That would probably be in Disney World waiting to go on Space Mountain. PGN: [Laughs]. Me too! I didn’t ask about your partner, Ali. How did you meet? NW: We met three years ago at Arcadia and, for our first date I made her drive us up to see the Lehigh Valley Rollergirls, and she fell in love in that moment.
PGN: [Laughs]. With you or with skating? NW: Both! She’s just starting our rookie program right now and we’ve been together now for three years.
PGN: Name three things you two have in common other than roller derby? NW: Our love of Thai food, a passion for binging on Netflix and our love of the water. Her family has a lakehouse in Connecticut and we go up every year with our dogs for the Fourth of July and throughout the summer. She has a sailboat so we’ll take that out on the water and go tubing and waterskiing. It’s always a great time, being able to be together and spend time with her family.
PGN: Right now I’m most excited about … NW: Our new class of rookies at Penn Jersey. Some people have been on skates before and for some this is their first time. If people are interested in joining, our “Get a Pair” program is running for about another week, no experience necessary. Classes are Tuesday and Thursday from 8-10 p.m. at our warehouse. All you need to do is show up to get started. You can get information on our website.
PGN: I understand you do a derby workout for people who just want to get into shape. NW: Yeah, it’s something we do every Sunday and it’s open to anyone who wants to come ($5 for nonmembers). It’s off skates and on skates, basic drills and it’s a great full-body workout. [Laughs] You never really notice how heavy your weights are until you try to pick them up with skates on! It’s a lot of fun and a great way to just test the waters and see what we’re all about from a less-intimidating perspective. We also host Quizzo on the first Tuesday of every month at The Institute.
PGN: What life lessons have you learned from roller derby? NW: I follow a website called Derbylife, and they ran an article called, “The Art of Falling Down” by Daphne du Gorier. It talks about how when you fall for the first time it’s scary, it’s terrifying — but if you’re not falling, you’re not learning, you’re not pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone and you’re never going to grow. That applies to all areas of life, whether it’s a new job, school, derby … When you fall down you need to get up for yourself. People will help you up but you need to want to do it for yourself. Any time I get knocked down and I get frustrated I just say to myself, “You know what? I need to learn how to take a hit and to be more aware of where I am and where other people are in relation to me. So pick yourself up, learn your lesson and do better next time.” I find that applies on and off the track.
For more information about Penn Jersey Roller Derby, visit www.pennjerseyrollerderby.com or www.facebook.com/pennjerseyrollerderby.
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