Although a Valentine’s Day-themed contest run by St. Joseph’s University Alumni Association got off to a not-so-sweet start for a local lesbian couple, the women are now poised to become winners — in a number of ways.
Katie MacTurk and Megan Edwards are enjoying a very comfortable lead in the “How I Met My Hawkmate” contest, a Facebook competition in which St. Joe’s alums share their stories of how they met their partners on Hawk Hill — which the association initially excluded the couple from because of their sexual orientation.
The pair, both 24, met during their senior year at an LGBT support group at St. Joe’s, where MacTurk double-majored in psychology and Spanish and Edwards studied elementary and special education with a minor in faith-justice studies.
Both graduated in 2009 and Edwards went on to become a teacher in the School District of Philadelphia, while MacTurk earned her master’s degree in experimental psychology from St. Joe’s and now works at a market-research firm.
The couple, who lives in Callowhill, got engaged in October and decided to submit their love story to the Hawkmate contest at the urging of several friends.
“A few of our friends suggested we do it and, being part of the LGBT community, I guess you always have this thing in the back of your head of, ‘Will I be included?’ But I honestly thought it would be fine,” Edwards said. “So we came up with the blurb and submitted it and didn’t think anything of it.”
When four days went by without their entry being posted to the Facebook site, however, the couple emailed the association to inquire and, after receiving no response for several more days, MacTurk called on Feb. 1.
While she said the association representative was apologetic, he informed her that, as St. Joe’s is a Catholic university and the Catholic Church does not recognize same-sex marriage, the organization decided not to include their story.
“I wasn’t that surprised to hear that because it had been several days of them not returning our email and not posting our story so we had our suspicions,” MacTurk said. “I was preparing myself for that and going over what I would say, but to hear him actually say, ‘I hate to tell you this but we decided not to post it,’ was really upsetting. I was just shaking and starting to cry, because as much as you can prepare yourself for being discriminated against, it’s still awful.”
Edwards said she had a similar reaction when MacTurk texted her at work to inform her of the association’s decision.
“I think what affected me most was during that week seeing all of the other couples’ pictures that they were posting and the fact that they weren’t even responding to us,” Edwards said. “If we hadn’t reached out to them, I’m not sure they would’ve said anything at all. And that’s so opposite of the experience I had at St. Joe’s. It’s a Jesuit school and there’s this underlying theme of accepting of everyone who they are, where they are and whatever walk of life they come from. Hearing from a place that is so near and dear to both of us, a place where we always felt accepted and loved, that we weren’t accepted was really hard.”
Later that day, the couple posted an account of their situation on Facebook.
Edwards said they weren’t looking for acceptance into the contest but rather for conversation among St. Joe’s and its alums about the association’s attitudes toward same-sex couples.
“My first reaction was to type up a letter to start a dialogue. That’s what we were taught at St. Joe’s — nothing bad can come of a dialogue,” Edwards said. “We wanted to see what people thought of why they didn’t include us, the way we were ignored and treated and how the alumni association really hadn’t seemed to consider that they would have any same-sex couples who found each other at St. Joe’s. So we thought maybe 10 people or so would share it and we could have some discussions with the alumni association about what they would do to make sure all alumni feel included in events in the future. But then four people shared it in the first five minutes and it just became a whirlwind.”
While they initially wanted to resist media requests because they were hoping to keep the story contained within the St. Joe’s community and prevent the situation from turning into a religious debate, the story went viral nonetheless and was picked up by local news outlets, blogs and news sites around the country.
Supporters turned up in droves on the alumni association’s Facebook page to voice concerns and Edwards said they were overwhelmed by the response.
“We received so many messages from current students who identify as LGBT thanking us, and it was important for us that they were able to see that the support that we were getting was for them too. Our goal was to create change and, at the end of the day, this prompted a very positive dialogue on the campus. I’m very happy with the response and could never, ever in a million years have thought it would have turned into this.”
When MacTurk initially talked to the alumni representative, they agreed that he would call her back the following day to put her in touch with someone with whom she could file a grievance.
However, when he called Thursday, it was to inform her that the association had reversed its decision.
“He called and said, ‘I don’t know if you saw, but we did post your picture. This has caused quite a stir within the university and it broke my heart to tell you that yesterday,’” MacTurk said.
Last week, the alumni association issued a statement that read, “St. Joseph’s University fully supports and is in agreement with the Catholic Church’s teachings regarding homosexuality and same-sex marriage. As a Catholic, Jesuit university, St. Joseph’s is a welcoming, inclusive community. Our focus is on respect and caring for all individuals as individuals.”
The university’s nondiscrimination policy is inclusive of sexual orientation.
The association did not respond to a request for comment by presstime.
It is unclear who in the association made the decisions regarding the contest and, while MacTurk said she hopes the reversal was made following a thoughtful discussion and not from a public-relations standpoint, the end result remains the same.
“I’d like to think the alumni association discussed it and thought about the Jesuit ideals and what the competition was supposed to be about, as opposed to focusing just on the bad press the university was getting,” she said.
MacTurk and Edwards did not receive an apology from the alumni association but have had private conversations with the director of the organization, and will meet with him to discuss future LGBT inclusion.
“As much as an apology would be great and mean a lot not just to us, but to the entire LGBT community at SJU,” MacTurk said, “if the university and alumni association can make a more welcoming community for LGBT folks, that is a lot more meaningful.”
In terms of the contest, the couple with the most Facebook “likes” by Feb. 14 will win a $100 gift certificate to a restaurant of their choice. After the widespread attention their story received, MacTurk and Edwards had 10 times the number of votes of their nearest competitor at presstime.
If successful, they plan to donate the $100 to the St. Joe’s Gay-Straight Alliance.
Jen Colletta can be reached at [email protected].