Creep of the Week: Vicky Hartzler

Gays are a bunch of crybabies. Yeah, I said it. And you know what that took? Courage.

And you know who knows about courage? U.S. Rep. Vicky Hartzler (R-Mo.), that’s who.

No, she didn’t come right out and say that gays were crybabies, but she clearly thinks they need to quit whining and get over themselves.

On June 29, gay-rights advocates at a public forum who filmed the encounter confronted Hartzler.

“First of all, are you guys with the Democrats or the Republicans?” Hartzler asked them. “I just wondered, are you friendly or are you not?” Of course, when a politician asks if you’re “friendly,” she’s really asking, “Are you going to kiss my ass or challenge me?”

The activists asked Hartzler about comments she’d made during a recent address to the Eagle Forum Collegians 2011 Summit, a get-together of young conservatives. During the address, she’d made a slippery-slope argument, likening two consenting adults of the same sex marrying each other to polygamy and incest, and then said that gays didn’t deserve marriage equality any more than a 3-year-old had the right to drive a car.

During the summit address she said, “Pretty soon, if you don’t set parameters, you don’t have any parameters at all, the [marriage] license means nothing — the marriage means nothing. It’s their right to marry whoever they want, but we’re saying marriage is between a man and a woman. So, there’s a difference there. But it’s not a right in the Constitution as far as that goes either. It’s not a right of anybody — of a 3-year-old to be able to drive a car. You know, the government has set some parameters that they think is correct.”

She’s right, of course, that 3-year-olds don’t have a right to drive. Unless, of course, that 3-year-old has successfully obtained his or her hardship license.

But I digress. Hartzler replied to the activist asking her about the aforementioned statement, “No, no, no. You misunderstood. That was a misunderstanding of the quote,” then added, “That was really taken out of context.”

It’s hard to imagine how such comments can be misconstrued or taken out of context. Especially because it’s not like Hartzler hasn’t already made herself into one of the most outspoken foes of gay rights.

Hartzler was a big player in the 2004 antigay marriage ban enshrined in the Missouri constitution. When asked about the amendment she replied sarcastically, “I can’t believe you asked me that. I’m so surprised. I’m so, so surprised.”

An activist asked, “How do you think that makes young people like me feel about ourselves, to come up in a society that to us feels like doesn’t value us in the same way straight people are valued?”

Needless to say, Hartzler didn’t exactly answer the question. “We’re not the ones changing the policy. OK, so you shouldn’t feel bad at all,” she said.

“Why shouldn’t I feel bad if there’s an amendment, if you champion an amendment prohibiting me from [marrying]?” he asked.

“Right now it has been the law of the land for a long time. Marriage is between a man and a woman. All we did in 2004 is just put that in the constitution. So we’re not changing policy at all. And, anyway, so you shouldn’t feel bad,” she replied.

See? Quit crying, crybaby gays. You shouldn’t feel bad (read: cry) over some silly little amendment to the constitution that enshrines your second-class status. It was already illegal for gays to marry each other. Gosh.

Hartzler clearly gets it. Not only does she think gays are immoral and that gay rights are hogwash, but she understands that amending the constitution, even a state constitution, is no big deal. So quit yer cryin’.

D’Anne Witkowski has been gay for pay since 2003. She’s a freelance writer and poet (believe it!). When she’s not taking on the creeps of the world, she reviews rock ’n’ roll shows in Detroit with her twin sister.