Hit the reset button

It’s hard to believe that my next column will run in 2010! In preparation for today’s piece, I’ve been reminiscing about the most memorable moments of the previous year, and it got me thinking about the importance of social experiences in our lives. If you ask a friend, colleague or even a stranger to list his/her 10 most noteworthy events of 2009, I can guarantee that several will be of the social variety.

Even in the electronic age, when so many of our interactions are mediated through Skype, Facebook, Twitter and other digital tools, there remains no substitute for honest and present personal interaction. From surprise birthday parties and vacations to live concerts and holiday celebrations to political rallies and fundraising events, our lives are indelibly marked by the occasions that provide us with the opportunity to truly engage with the people in our lives. Our social experiences give us a chance to build and share love and support that can only come from those who truly have our best interests at heart.

The reason I’m sharing this perspective is because we tend to think of our social lives as a luxury — something that takes a backseat to professional commitments, obligations and many other sources of stress. We tend to enjoy our social lives only when we everything else is handled, managed and tied up. But if many of our most valuable and meaningful experiences are the social ones, why do we view them as dispensable, compulsory or optional? Why do we engage socially only if we have time? Why are we often hesitant to recognize the true value of every second we get to spend with those close to us? Why do we waste so much time and energy on drama, disputes and distractions that drive us apart instead of bringing us closer together? None of us can answer all of these questions, but we can try to do better moving forward. That’s the great thing about the beginning of each new year: It’s our chance to hit the reset button.

We’re emerging from a year during which much of the country experienced acute professional, personal and financial struggles, the likes of which many of us have never witnessed. In the LGBT community, we have spent 2009 continuing to fight for equal political rights and social legitimacy against an increasingly vocal, reactionary and vicious opposition that is threatened by a community of individuals who differ from them, and they use the rhetoric of fear to perpetuate divisiveness.

While there are signs these challenges may subside and improve in 2010, we certainly don’t have control over every aspect of the world in which we live. But each of us can control our social lives, improve our personal relationships and do right by the people around us. The past year has given many people a new perspective on what’s important. There is no better time to recommit to the experiences that will make up your top-10 experiences of 2010.

When I started writing this column, I planned to review some of the highlights of 2009 and preview the most exciting upcoming events of 2010 — after all, that’s my job with the Philadelphia Gay News. But at this moment, there seems nothing more important to share with my readers than what I’ve written here. Before I sign off, I want to wish all my readers happy holidays and thank my partner, family, friends and colleagues for your support.

’Til next time, get offline and see what your community has to offer!

If you have comments or information on upcoming events, e-mail [email protected], reference Offline.

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