My father, grandfather and sister all had successful careers in the military, and aside from the constant relocation, I found growing up in a Navy family overwhelmingly positive. My sister attended the U.S. Naval Academy and, after hearing about her experiences, all of which came at the expense of the U.S. Navy, I thought it might be a good college for me too.
I readied my application and attended a weeklong intensive seminar for interested high-school seniors. My best friends and I all began to seek nominations from Congressmembers and senators, a requirement for entry. I didn’t have the dream of flying jets or becoming a Marine after graduating the Academy, but I still wanted to attend. The resources, quality of education and overall experience seemed too good to pass up.
Perhaps the realist in me always knew I’d never send in the application, but I didn’t make the actual decision not to apply until the fall, when I had to admit to myself that the military wouldn’t take kindly to my type. Staying closeted didn’t seem like a good idea and, even today, there are no other options for gays in the military. Being able to come out meant my military aspirations couldn’t.
Fortunately, I saved myself from the fate so many other gay Americans have to endure. I used to joke to myself whenever someone brought up the prospect of a military draft that I’d be exempt, free from the anxiety and fear of being called. But there isn’t much to laugh about anymore.
We’ve all seen numerous stories. I read one about an Arabic-speaking linguist who was irreplaceable due to his expertise, yet forced out because of a revealing Internet chat. Coupled with the fact that he was well-liked by other soldiers and many of them knew he was gay, it simply doesn’t make sense anymore. Regardless of the arguments we hear from political and military leadership, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” needs to end.
The Servicemembers Legal Defense Network’s site, www.sldn.org, is an excellent place to learn about gays in the military and help change the issue for the better. There are numerous stories and news articles, legal advice for LGBT servicemembers, YouTube videos and links to social-networking groups, as well as sections on current legislation and how to help out.
Now, the Military Readiness Enhancement Act sits before the House of Representatives Armed Services Committee, which would repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” Along with learning about the legislation, viewers can also learn details on how to visit and lobby members of Congress, write effective letters and participate in local events. And, on every page of the site sits a running counter of discharges since President Obama took office. It’s at 224 people as I write this.
Considering that countries like Romania, the Philippines and Bermuda, which has a reputation as a homophobic country, allow gay people to serve in their militaries, ours has no excuse. Now that the issue is really heating up, it’s important to be able to discuss and debate with people who might not know the real effects it has on not just the LGBT community, but the quality of the military as well. Coming out for one’s self and one’s country should no longer be mutually exclusive.
Contact Jason with feedback at [email protected].