I think it is human nature, in times of crises, to try to cling to safety. No one wants to stick their neck out into harm’s way. This makes perfect, logical sense. And, let’s face it, these are times of crises.
I don’t wish to keep rehashing all that is going on, with a presidential administration that is busy targeting transgender people in the military, in schools, in sports, and — presumably — just sitting around in a coffee shop somewhere. Statehouses, too, continue to set up anti-trans bills.
Bigots, too, are emboldened by this administration, leading to more incidence of violence and discrimination, even as the government kicks anti-transgender discrimination cases behind their nearest credenza.
Likewise, the United Kingdom’s Supreme Court just ruled against transgender rights in a ruling the government is opting to interpret as broadly as they can, potentially stripping trans people of the right to even exist in public life.
Like I said, crises.
We all react to this in different ways. I know I’ve talked recently about transgender people stockpiling their meds and taking any steps they can to protect their identities in the eyes of the law. Many are doing their best to lay low, hoping they can evade unjust treatment.
In the midst of all this, too, we are acting out the five stages of grief. While I think most of us are well past denial, and deep into anger and depression, there are some who have taken a sharp right turn into bargaining for their safety. This is a problem.
The other day, I received an email from a retired transgender woman who has taken to podcasting.
In her missive, she has declared that it is not the administration at fault for the erosion of our rights, but that the real blame is on — wait for it — transgender activists. Specifically, “the loud, demanding, and proud ones.”
She, of course, is not that sort of activist, but only wants to live in peace, and avoid those whose lives are, again, in her words, “playing a role, acting out a fantasy, or into performance art.”
I am not calling her out here by name. My response is not solely directed at her, but at all who may be echoing her sentiments. I’m sure there are plenty of others who would like our trans community to be quiet right now, to stay small, where it is safer, and not draw attention to our needs. Frankly, I’ve seen this belief for as long as I have been in the community in some circles.
This insistence on being nice, and quiet, and simply giving in doesn’t work.
Likewise, as much as her view may rankle me, I do not wish to fall into the same trap, and start attacking her in the same vein as she attacks others. Honestly, we all are in the same fight.
That said, I know from my own experience that being quiet and playing nice doesn’t give you safety. It doesn’t keep your life peaceful. It only makes you a useful tool in your own oppression. At best, you’ll be the last one up against the wall. Make no mistake, though: you will be going up against the wall regardless.
Meanwhile, all those loud, demanding, and proud ones are out there making sure you may continue to live, often at great risk. They are the ones trying to make sure we maintain our unalienable rights in a time when every day brings forth new horror stories of people — trans and non-trans — who are seeing their rights violated.
These are the people who might have decided that the queens at Compton’s Cafeteria and the Stonewall Inn deserved to be harassed by the police. If only they hadn’t been demanding, after all, then the lives of those playing it safe elsewhere would not be at risk.
Frankly, the right was always going to come after us. They will be coming after the rest of the LGBTQ+ community as well. They’re busy tearing down decades of civil rights progress, and trying to return us to the era of Jim Crow and internment camps, and a time when women did not have the right to vote, let alone body autonomy.
They have made their agenda clear, and they will not rest until we all suffer.
Meanwhile, I’ll stay over here with the loud, demanding, and proud ones. Being quiet never got me anything in this world. I wish to secure my rights, not surrender them.
The activists of today who are on the front lines, pushing back against unjust laws in an era where the government could just as easily ship them to a prison camp in El Salvador without even a veneer of due process are the bravest people I can imagine, and I will always stand by them.
As should we all. The worst thing we can be doing right now is attacking each other. Like I said above, I didn’t name the person in question: I can only hope that she, too, might realize that there are multiple paths to a goal and, rather than attacking those who are trying to improve their world, she should consider what she could be doing right now to help out in her own way.
If you don’t like the “loud” trans activists, don’t attack them. Do your own work to improve the world — for if the goal is peace, work toward those who are truly standing in the way.
Else, I fear, the only peace we’ll find is in the graveyard.
Gwen Smith still wishes for a harmony of voices. You’ll find her at www.gwensmith.com.