The hottest months of the year are back, along with many opportunities to empty your bank account for any form of sonic or entertainment Xanax to sublimate your sense of rage and doom, as well as keep your attention away from the mounting pile of socio-political horror that pours forth like lava from a raging volcano.
Anyway, whether you are sticking to the humid urban jungle for your good times or fleeing to the closest shore to get away from it all, there are tons of entertainment options to keep the summertime fun flowing for anybody of any legal age. You know, until the days start getting shorter and the militarized police start forcefully shooing people off the streets for government-mandated curfews and brainwashing.
With that, get your credit cards ready and your SPF50 out — it’s time to summer.
Comedy/Humor
Kathleen Madigan: Boxed Wine & Bigfoot Tour
The comedian performs 9 p.m. July 14 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Music Box, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Jeff Dunham
The comedian and ventriloquist performs 4 and 8 p.m. July 22 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Jerry Seinfeld
The comedian and talk-show host performs 8 p.m. Aug. 19 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Craig Shoemaker
The comedian performs 9 p.m. Aug. 3 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Music Box, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Julie Goldman
The out comedian performs 7:30 p.m. Aug. 11 at The Rrazz Room, 385 W. Bridge St., New Hope; 888-596-1027.
Jim Gaffigan
The comedian performs 7 and 10 p.m. Aug. 4 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Jennie McNulty
The out comedian performs 7:30 p.m. Aug. 3 at The Rrazz Room, 385 W. Bridge St., New Hope; 888-596-1027.
Gabriel Iglesias: One Show Fits All World Tour
The comedian performs 8 p.m. Aug. 31 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Ken Jeong
The comedian and actor performs 9 p.m. Sept. 1 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Music Box, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Dave Attell
The comedian seen on Comedy Central performs Sept. 6-9 at Helium Comedy Club, 2031 Sansom St.; 215-496-9001.
Wanda Sykes
The out comedian performs 7:30 p.m. Sept. 28 at Keswick Theatre, 291 N. Keswick Ave.; 215-572-7650.
Music
Lindsey Sterling + Evanescence
The orchestral rock groups perform 7 p.m. July 17 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Britney Spears
The pop star performs July 19-21 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Beck
The alt-rock singer-songwriter performs 8 p.m. July 20 at Festival Pier at Penn’s Landing, 601 N. Columbus Blvd.; 215-922-1011.
Yes
The classic prog-rock band celebrates its 50 years with a performance 8 p.m. July 20 at The Fillmore Philadelphia, 29 E. Allen St.; 215-625-3681.
Weezer and The Pixies
The alternative-rock groups perform 7:30 p.m. July 21 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Prophets of Rage
The rap-rock supergroup performs 9 p.m. July 24 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Kesha and Macklemore
The pop artists perform 7 p.m. July 25 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
David Byrne
The Talking Heads singer and mastermind performs 6:30 p.m. July 27 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Panic at the Disco
The rock band performs 7 p.m. July 27 at Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St.; 215-389-9543.
The Smashing Pumpkins
The alternative-rock band performs 7 p.m. July 28 at Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St.; 215-389-9543.
Jay-Z and Beyonce: On The Run II Tour
The rap and R&B superstars perform 7:30 p.m. July 30 at Lincoln Financial Field, 1 Lincoln Financial Field Way; 267-570-4000.
My Bloody Valentine
The alt-rock shoegaze band performs 8 p.m. July 30 at The Fillmore Philadelphia, 29 E. Allen St.; 215-625-3681.
Radiohead
The experimental-rock band performs July 31-Aug. 1 at Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St.; 215-389-9543.
Chicago and REO Speedwagon
The classic rock bands perform 7:30 p.m. Aug. 1 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Rise Against & AFI
The alt-rock bands perform 7 p.m. Aug. 4 at Festival Pier at Penn’s Landing, 601 N. Columbus Blvd.; 215-922-1011.
Rod Stewart and Cyndi Lauper
The iconic singers team up to perform 7:30 p.m. Aug. 4 at Boardwalk Hall, 2301 Boardwalk, Atlantic City; 609-348-7000.
Phish
The rock band performs Aug. 7-8 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson
The shock-rockers perform 7 p.m. Aug. 9 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
311 & The Offspring: Never-Ending Summer Tour
The alt-rock bands perform 7 p.m. Aug. 10 at Festival Pier at Penn’s Landing, 601 N. Columbus Blvd.; 215-922-1011.
Counting Crows
The alternative-rock band performs 6:30 p.m. Aug. 11 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Gladys Knight & The O’Jays
The classic R&B singers perform 8 p.m. Aug. 12 at The Mann Center, 5201 Parkside Ave.; 215-546-7900.
Pentatonix
The vocal pop group performs 8 p.m. Aug. 14 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Breaking Benjamin and Five Finger Death Punch
The hard-rock bands perform 6 p.m. Aug. 15 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
CAKE and Ben Folds
The alternative rockers perform 7 p.m. Aug. 16 at The Mann Center, 5201 Parkside Ave.; 215-546-7900.
Cher
The pop icon performs Aug. 17-18 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
3 Doors Down & Collective Soul
The rock bands perform 8 p.m. Aug. 19 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
The Descendants
The alt-rock band performs 8 p.m. Aug. 23 at The Fillmore Philadelphia, 29 E. Allen St.; 215-625-3681.
I Love the ’90’s Tour
Salt-N-Pepa, Coolio, 2 Live Crew, Biz Markie, Rob Base and more perform 7:30 p.m. Aug. 24 at BB&T Pavilion, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.; 609-365-1300.
Stevie Wonder
The R&B legend performs Aug. 25-26 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
King’s X
The rock band featuring out bassist Doug Pinnick performs 8 p.m. Aug. 26 at Sellersville Theater 1894, 24 W. Temple Ave., Sellersville; 215-257-5808.
Earth Wind & Fire
The R&B group performs 8 p.m. Sept. 1 at the Borgata Hotel, Casino & Spa Event Center, 1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.; 609-317-1000.
Made in America Festival
Nicki Minaj and Post Malone headline the outdoor concert featuring Meek Mill, Janelle Monae, Diplo and more, Sept. 1-2 at Benjamin Franklin Parkway; www.madeinamericafest.com.
Elton John
The classic rock and pop singer performs as part of his farewell tour Sept. 11-12 at Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St.; 215-389-9543.
Bruno Mars and Cardi B
The R&B-pop singers perform Sept. 19-20 at Wells Fargo Center, 3601 S. Broad St.; 215-389-9543.
Chrisette Michele
The Grammy Award-winning R&B singer-songwriter performs 8 p.m. Sept. 20 at Keswick Theatre, 291 N. Keswick Ave.; 215-572-7650.
Nightlife
FREAQ — A Boys of Summer Adventure
The fetish-themed dance party heats up 1- p.m.-3 a.m. Aug. 4 at Voyeur Nightclub, 1221 St. James St.; 215-735-5772.
Simply Barbra Celebrates the 50th Anniversary of Funny Girl
Steven Brinberg performs a Barbra Streisand tribute 8 p.m. Sept. 1 at The Rrazz Room, 6426 Lower York Rd.; 888-596-1027.
ºNicky as Carol Channing: A Musical Revue
Vaudeville lives again when this singer puts on a tribute performance 8 p.m. Sept. 15 at The Rrazz Room, 6426 Lower York Rd.; 888-596-1027.