When Pastor Pamela K. Williams’ mother was dying last spring, the woman called her daughter to her bedside.
“Can you forgive me?” she asked. “I let people say things about you … I didn’t stop it.”
Williams, who is a lesbian, assured her mother that she had nothing to apologize for. She wished she could repay her mother for the sacrifices she made to help her children lead successful lives.
“I stand before you now as an unapologetic lesbian Baptist preacher in the city of Philadelphia,” Williams told a roomful of older adults June 3 at the Southwest Senior Center on Elmwood Avenue. More than 50 people attended the first Pride at a city senior center. Many wore purple shirts that said, “LGBT Supporter.”
“God couldn’t use me while I was living a lie,” Williams said of the need to come out. She has now been married two years to the woman she met 20 years ago.
Williams, who leads the Ark of the Refuge Tabernacle in West Philadelphia, received a standing ovation. Other speakers included two women from PFLAG, a group for parents of LGBT kids; Paulette Cunningham, director of the Southwest Senior Center; and Terri Clark, who leads intimacy-in-aging workshops.
“LGBT Pride is the positive stance against discrimination,” Clark said while explaining the history of the Stonewall Riots in New York City and the evolution of Pride celebrations.
The William Way LGBT Community Center, LGBT Elder Initiative and Free Library of Philadelphia also had tables at the event, which concluded with lunch and socializing.
Linda Marucci, a social worker at the senior center who recently came out to her coworkers, is planning to start an LGBT book club at the center. In collaboration with the city library system, Marucci would like to design an intergenerational book club that could meet monthly at different venues. It’s expected to start in October to coincide with LGBT History Month.
Marucci worked with Clark to plan the first Pride at the Southwest Senior Center. In 2013, Clark received a grant from the Philadelphia Corporation for Aging that allowed her to present workshops on sexual education and health at select senior centers. The funding has since concluded, but Clark continued the work.
During one workshop in the fall at the Southwest Senior Center, Clark said members had questions about LGBT people.
“Older adults are thinking about these issues,” she said. “They want permission to ask questions.”
From there, Pride at Southwest Senior Center developed. Clark said she hoped it would become a catalyst for more programs and conversations.
“As people become more knowledgeable, they’re more loving,” Marucci said.
Priscilla Walters, who attended the senior center’s Pride, took charge of distributing the purple shirts. She said her niece is gay.
Walters said it really hit home for her when Williams, the pastor, spoke about families not banishing their LGBT relations from their homes or gatherings.
“I invite my niece to my house and I say, ‘Bring your friends with you,’” Walters said. “We need to support them.”
Rosalee Lacy, president of the center’s advisory council, said the Pride program was very moving. She said she and the women she was sitting with talked about the things they learned.
“What made me cry is how that mom’s son didn’t tell her he was gay for so long,” said Joyce Coleman, a volunteer and member of the center. She was referring to a story told by Barbara Klinman with PFLAG.
Klinman remembered that her son Jason came out to her and her husband when he was 29. He said his brother already knew, as did some of his high-school friends and their parents.
“I think about people in my family who’ve suffered in silence,” Coleman said, adding she was glad to have the Pride program at the senior center. “It was great exposure. I think it’s been a long time coming.”